Good Advice Ladies...

Good advice, Ladies! If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.

Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently? Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later. You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less. Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else's man. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you. All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the bending... compromise is two way street. You need time to heal between relationships... there is nothing cute about baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you... a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals.. look for someone complimentary... not supplementary. Dating is fun... even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right. Make him miss you sometimes... when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted. Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make someone smile, another rethink her/his choices, and another woman prepare, and a man aware.

Completeness

Never say that someone completes you. We have to feel whole even when we are by ourselves, for needing a certain someone is not love, but dependency. Wanting a person to become a part of your life is the best reason for having them. So rather than search for the someone who will complete you, wait for the person that will compliment your completeness.

The Holidays

Aahh the Holidays!! I really really do love the holidays - but this year has just been kind of weird for me. I *always* know what I am doing for the holidays...until this year. And I don't like that feeling. I think it mostly has to do with my family being out of state and mom is in Kodiak. I spent Thanksgiving with a few family members of mine...but we went to extended familys house which was different because I really didn't know anyone, and I am used to being with MY family. On top of that - I am sitting there seeing all these "happy" little familys with their babies running around. And here I am, just me all by myself...wondering when the hell and I going to find happiness...I am looking at these people who are fortunate enough to have somone who loves them and have a family of their own...yet they already have one child they gave up one, or they can't hold a steady job, or live house to house, or have to always borrow money to feed their child or provide clothes for them. Yet, I guess when you have love...you don't need anything else.

So Christmas is creepn' up on us like REALLY soon! Here I am having a "pitty-party" for myself - becuase I have absoulty no idea what I am going to do for Christmas, I'm thinking I will just hangout at home with the roomie...then the roomie comes home all excited because she gets to go home for the holidays...well there goes there plans! So at this point I am getting super bummed out - thought okay I will just hangout at home, spend the day with my animals. How pathedic is that...I have a *huge* family and I am going to sit at home by myself.




I was sitting around talking with old school friend Daniel, who just came home from Kodiak and he was saying he didn't have anything to do for Christmas. And I just in casual converstaion mentioned how my mom wanted me in Kodiak for Christmas but I really couldn't afford to go. He suggested since neither one of us has anything to do and he needs to go to Kodiak anyways...he would buy the both of us tickets to Kodiak! So we leave Anchorage Dec.23rd and I return home Dec. 26th...I *have* to be here for our CU1 Holiday Party on the 27th. Daniel will stay in Kodiak because he leaves on his boat, The Handler...to go crabbing on the 27th.



I am *so* excited to have friends/family to spend Christmas with. Plus Daniel is from Kodiak so he will know some people to hangout with over there...well we will be with my family for the most part. Yummy I'm excited for Mom's Christmas dinner!!




I really wish I could be with Erin for Christmas - we could eat TONS of Christmas dinner then snuggle and watch movie after movie! Erin, you really need to move home because I miss you too much!

So really the Holidays won't be too bad :] I am excited to be with people I love...well I love Erin too but she will be in Minnesota, far far away from AK. But I do still love her with my ENTIRE heart!! xoox

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

A Hard Life Lesson

One of my hardest life lessons has been realizing that holding on to a person, a goal or a dream can be destructive. Many times trying to "go back through the old door" is not what is needed to keep growing and thriving. These setbacks also require learning to recognize when it is time and a necessity to integrate the change or loss and "let go". Perhaps the most difficult part of "letting go" is finding the internal strength to recognize it is time and then letting the person or thing go, and let the dream die. I have had to reframe many of my past relationships or friendships as "deaths" (of the friendship or relationship and the person you thought you knew) in order to reach an acceptance point, move on and let go.

Hoodys

So as I am putting my heaping pile of laundry away the other night...I decided to do a quick count of ALL the hoodys I have hanging in my closet - a rough count of 31 hoodys it was! Can you tell - my favorite arcticle of clother is HOODYS! I thought I would do a little research on the history of the hooded sweatshirts and here is a little info I came across that I thought was intersting:

A hoodie (or hoody), short for hooded sweatshirt, is a heavy upper-body garment with a hood. The characteristic design includes large frontal pockets, a hood, and, usually, a drawstring to adjust the hood opening. Hoodies with zippers are called "zip hoodies", "zip-ups" or "zippies". The history of the specific garment began in the 1930s, but historical precedent dates the style and form of the hoodie back to the Middle Ages. The formal wear for Catholic monks included a cowl, a long, decorative hood worn in addition to the standard tunic or robes. The modern clothing style was first produced by Champion in the 1930s for laborers in the frozen warehouses of New York. Its popularity spread as sportswear designers such as Claire McCardell developed entire collections based around the clothing.[citation needed]
The hoodie took off in the 1970s as several factors contributed to its success. Hip hop culture developed in New York City around this time, and the hoodie's element of instant anonymity, provided by the accessible hood, appealed to those with criminal intent. High fashion also contributed during this era, as Norma Kamali and other high-profile designers embraced and glamorized the new clothing.Most critical to the hoodie's popularity during this time was its iconic appearance in the blockbuster Rocky film. His attire embodied the persevering spirit of the American Dream at the time, and simultaneously appealed to workingmen, street thugs, and athletes.[citation needed] By the 1990s, the hoodie had evolved into a symbol of isolation, a statement of academic spirit, and several fashion collections.[citation needed] The association with chavs in the UK developed around this time, as their popularity rose with that specific demographic. Young men, often skateboarders or surfers, sported the hoodie and spread the trend across the western United States, most significantly in California.[citation needed] The rise of hoodies with university logos began around this time.[citation needed] Tommy Hilfiger, Giorgio Armani, and Ralph Lauren, for example, used the hoodie as the primary component for many of their collections in the 1990s.

In February 2006, a 58-year-old teacher who was wearing a hooded top was asked to remove it when entering a Tesco store in Swindon. According to the teacher, she was wearing the hood because "my hair's a mess". The shop apologized and said it was taking action to "make sure this doesn't happen again.
In 2005, Coombeshead College in the south-west of England, allowed the hoodie to become part of the school uniform, but the hood could be put up only when it rained. The principal, Richard Haigh stated that the move would help to calm some of what he called the "hysteria" surrounding the garment.In July 2006, David Cameron, leader of the Conservative Party, made a speech suggesting that the hoodie was worn more for defensive than offensive purposes.The speech was referred to as "hug a hoodie" by the Labour Party. Cameron also perpetuated the mistaken use of the word hoodie to refer to a wearer of a hooded garment, rather than the garment itself, a mistake that many older Britons now continue to make.

And the best part is..."National Hoodie Day", a pro-youth initiative to challenge youth stereotypes, was launched in May 2008 in New Zealand. The campaign resulted in criticism at a number of levels within government,including a local council member donning a Ku Klux Klan outfit in protest, citing the hoodie as "not an appropriate article of clothing to celebrate".

So I starting thinking of reasons why I love my hoodys, and her are SOME of them:

• in my hoody I can hide
• they are quick and easy to put on
• you can dress up or down in a hoody
• they are super cozy
• they go great with PJ pants
• on those "I feels super fat" days, they cover everything
• they are warm
• hoodys make great souviners from places you visit
• if your hair is a mess...easy...just wear your hood
• your hood will protect your beautiful hair do from snow, wind and rain
• bottom line...hoodys are SIMPLY AMAZING

Brady...Come Home!

It's better to say too much...than to never say what you needed to say.

Where you used to be, there is a hole in my world. I miss you like hell.

When you say "i miss you" to someone, then YOU have missed either to accept ALL his love or YOU have missed to accept ALL love and help that person was ready and able to GIVE YOU or YOU have failed to dissolve all karma between you both and thus you have created future as you have created the NEED for another meeting to do what you could have done already. What to do when you miss someone...love him fully accept all his love -open your heart - say YES to whatever happens next time you meet -say YES to all love - instantly -Do it - all - whatever - at once ! NEVER say "later" or "maybe" do it NOW and give it with all the power of love from the bottom of your heart and soul! Accept all that person has to give you, give all you have to give and could give if you want to give ALL - and do it all at once.

Someday again...

Someday again I would like to (in the words of Juno) find a person who will love me for exaclty who I am. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome...the right person is still gonna think the sun shines out your ass. Thats the kind of person worth sticking with!

I miss that feeling of having a person in my life who gives me butterflies, make me feel like I am walking on clouds, someone who I just can not stop thinking about, someone that will make me smile even when I'm sad, someone to spend my days with, look forward to doing fun things, someone to snuggle and watch movies with on a cold day or when I'm not feeling well. Someone who will love going on road trips with me, go for walks even on cold AK winter nights, someone who will stop by just to say hi, hold my hand, kiss my forhead, when we go snowmaching or snowboarding make sure I don't fall behind, someone that will enjoy going on vacations together, be absoultly crazy about each other, help me work on my truck & toys, someone who I can do everything or nothing with and still have the best time. When we walk by others they can tell how happy and how in love we are and they would be the ones saying "gosh I wish I had a "someone" in my life like that" instead of that being me saying that. Someone I can completly be myself with, share anything with.

It's not about finding the perfect person, but the imperfect person...perfect! I know everyone hopes for this kind of relationship or love...but damnit I need it! Ha!

Erin - you and I are great catches...we rock...we are flippn' amazing! Someday our Mr. Perfects will show up, and realize that we are everything they have EVER looked for! Until then - and even long after then...we will always have each other. I love and miss you more than words could ever explain! Mwah!

What I am thankful for...

With Thanksgiving around the corner it is time to start thinking about what we are thankful for...i could keep the list going and going...

First and foremost I’m thankful for my family, who when faced with all the trials I put myself through growing up, never failed to show me love and not once turned their back on me. They’re the one constant in my life that I know without a doubt will be there regardless of circumstance. I can't thank them enough. They gave me a good concience, and gave me a firm grasp on the difference between right and wrong while still allowing me to make my own decisions. my mother for teaching my the importance of my independence, making me believe in my abilities, encouraging my creativity and making me proud of the person I’ve become. My father for giving me my skeptical nature, my strong work ethic and grasp of financial concepts and most importantly for taking me as his responsibility without fail while still never making me feel that I wasn't his own child.
I’m thankful for the education I received, and for the teachers who saw my education as the lighting of a fire, not the filling of a bucket. They not only gave me a foundation for living a productive life, but sparked an inquisitive and investigative nature.
I’m thankful for living in a country where my gender didn't hinder me from becoming the person i want to be. A country where i can vote in elections or even run for office. A country where I’m not persecuted for my ideas and am given the freedom to practice whichever religion makes me feel complete.
I’m thankful for my job, my ability to work, and my ability to be self- sufficient. I’m thankful for the people I love, and the people I’ve loved in the past. The heart is a muscle, and the more it's used, the stronger it gets.
I’m thankful that my heart is the strongest muscle in my body. The relationships I’ve had have taught me invaluable lessons, and what to expect of myself and other people. I’m thankful for my health. While I may have a crooked back, some cavities, and be prone to a cough if I get cold, I can still wake up every morning, stand on my two legs and walk to the shower. I can still look in the mirror with two green eyes, and breathe in with healthy lungs.
I’m thankful for the people who've died to make my life better- the brave men and women who give their lives to help make sure that mine is comfortable and protected.
I’m thankful for my positive outlook, my ability to see the best in people and my ability to try and look at the greater good and the bigger picture.
Let’s all try and remember to do a little personal reflection, and realize that maybe (just maybe) we should take a break from our bitching and moaning, our complaining and protesting, our Prozac and lattes, to realize that we really don't have it that bad.

Post Secret

PostSecret is an ongoing community mail art project in which people mail their secrets anonymously on one side of a homemade postcard.Here are a few from Post Secret I liked and can relate too...enjoy!

About me...

I am a daughter, a sister, a granddaughter, a niece, a cousin, a friend, a young girl and a grown woman.I am confident and scared, terrified and excited. I am loving and caring, and thoughtful and hopeful. I am sick and tired. I am shy and friendly, and careful and careless. I am broken and whole. I am misunderstood, misguided and mislead. I am hardworking and determinded, but a little scared on the inside. I wish on stars and dream my dreams. I pray to god and cry my tears. I smile on the outside while I'm dying on the inside. I listen to others who won't listen to me. I walk on eggshells and I walk on fire. I drive like and asshole and love it!!!I am me; there is no one like me. I love the outdoors, nothing can top it. I love snocross, snowboarding, dirtbikes, 4x4n, big trucks, monster trucks, camping, fishing, a little hiking, sitting around a campfire with my closest friends drinking a beer. I dont like girls. I have very few girl friends. I like getting dirty and greasy - working on my truck, bike or sled kicks ass! I like Ford and Arctic Cat. I have a close group of friends, they know who they are, and I would do anything for them. I miss my close friends. I miss hanging out with my close friends. I like Coors Light. Patron. Corona. I love the snow, mud and dirt. I love the summer and winter. Swimming in Alaska rocks. I love my family more than anything ever! I know a shit load of people that I have simple short conversations here and there. I dont like drama or girls (even guys) with a lot of drama. I am quite blunt; I would rather be hurt by the truth then lied to. I dont like waiting for anyone who takes forever to get ready. I hate gold-diggers. I miss my childhood friend Fritz so much (R.I.P). I grew up in the most awesome place ever; Cooper Landing. I love lakes and river. Nothing beats floating the river on a hot summer day reeln in some pigs. I dont like criticism. I cant stand controlling people. I miss my family everyday! I dont want to live like I am old, I will always be young. I want to look back on my life and feel like I have accomplished everything I ever wanted to. I want to travel A LOT more then I have. There are so many places I want to see before I die. I dont like small minded people. I love road trips, mountains and a good tan. I have been through and seen more in my 26 years among the earth then most othersit makes me the person I am today. My will is stronger then most.Ihave lost more people in my life than ever imagined in the past few years. RIP Jade, Fritz, Holden, Jason, Christoph - all wonderful young men who were taken away way too soon.I miss you guys. I love Turnagain Arm, Seward, Moose Pass, Cooper Landing and Girdwood. I hate cheaters. And people who have to lie to make themselves look good. I cant stand people who run their mouth and cant back it up. I love Alaska. I am happy and outgoing. I am a one and only.

In the long run...

In the long run, it's not a question of whether they deserve to be forgiven. You're not forgiving them for their sake. You're doing it for yourself. For your own health and well-being, forgiveness is simply the most energy-efficient option. It frees you from the incredibly toxic, debilitating drain of holding a grudge. Don't let these people live rent free in your head. If they hurt you before, why let them keep doing it year after year in your mind? It's not worth it but it takes heart effort to stop it. You can muster that heart power to forgive them as a way of looking out for yourself. It's one thing you can be totally selfish about.

Take it slowly. The deepest resentments are wrapped up in a lot of hurt and pain. We think we're protecting ourselves by not forgiving. Acknowledge that and go easy on yourself. Forgiveness means that you've decided not to let it keep festering inside even if it only comes up once in awhile. Forgiveness is a powerful yet challenging tool that will support and honor you, even in the most extreme circumstances.

Sincere forgiveness isn't colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change. Don't worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time—just like it does for you and me.

May you find serenity and tranquility in a world you may not always understand. May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism. Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone. May you discover enough goodness in others to believe in a world of peace. May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them. Remember the sunshine when the storm seems unending. Teach love to those who hate, and let that love embrace you as you go out into the world. May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them. Remember, those whose lives you have touched and whose have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished. It is the content of the encounter that is more important than the form. May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart. Find time each day to see beauty and love in the world around you. Realize that each person has limitless abilities, but each of us is different in our own way. What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future. May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility. Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience. May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments. May you always feel loved.

Don't hold to anger, hurt or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.
I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.

New To Blogspot

Hi everyone!

So here I am...I never had a blogspot before. I had a livejournal - but not too fond of it. Of course...I have a myspace (along with everyone else in the world) but wanted somewhere that I could just vent and write...happy or sad.

The downlow on myself - I'm a 26 year old single lady, who enjoys being with my family & friends more than anything. Oh - my pets too. I have a American Bulldog mix named Seven, and two cats - Chiquita & Pita (Pain in the Ass).

I bought a house in October of 2006 - it is a tiny little place...but hey I love it! It is MINE! I recently had some tile work done to it - Thanks Matt! I look forward to doing a few more upgrades on the inside and working in the yard this summer! I love the outdoors - camping, hiking, snowboard, snowmaching...you name I've been there done that...and loved every minute of it! I have a group of friends that I would do anything in the world for...and they know who they are. I don't get along with very many other girls...so the girlfriends that I do have I hold very close to my heart. Growing up in a small town - I had mostly guy friends...one of which I lost in a tragic airplane accident 2 years ago (RIP Fritz) not a day goes by that I don't think about him. But I always know that until I get to see him again...he walks with me.

Well I probably should get back to getting something done around here...tee-hee...Look forward to many blogs from me...and hopefully I will keep in touch with those whom don't have myspace :)

Mucho Love!

B